Hi Realists! 👋

Welcome to Cup of Ambition, Volume 13!

In this edition, you’ll get the scoop on:

‼️‼️  9-to-5 Dilemma: Are You Lazy or Languishing?

📌  2024 Coach Awards Career Coach of the Year Voting.

🆘 Normalize, Don’t Idolize, Success.

🦁 Prove Your Power: Results > Responsibilities.

9-to-5 Dilemma.

Navigating a 9-to-5

“Well, it’s been almost a whole year since I committed to getting a new job, but I’ve made zero progress. In January, I told myself that this year would be different and that I’d actually find a new job that makes me less miserable and pays me more. Every time I felt the urge to do it, I was so exhausted and fried that I couldn’t even think of where to start. I know I’m underpaid, and I know that I’m burnt out. Am I lazy? Why am I always my own biggest barrier? Any tips on getting started when you feel like you have no idea where to start?”

- Lazy and Languishing

What’s your current 9 to 5 dilemma? Send your story to: [email protected]

Dear Languishing,

You aren’t lazy, but like so many others navigating today’s demanding world, you’re stuck in that heavy, uninspired state of languishing—an often-overlooked side effect of constant burnout and stress. When we’re in this place, even the simplest tasks feel monumental, and starting a job search—something that requires energy, optimism, and a clear mind—can feel like a mountain we’re just not ready to climb. Take one look around this week, and it’s easy to see that we’re all fried.

Here are some steps to help you ease into this process without overwhelming yourself:

Break It Down Into Bite-Sized Steps
Begin with small, manageable actions. Instead of setting out to “find a new job,” focus on just one thing at a time. This could be as simple as updating your LinkedIn headline, jotting down a list of five companies you’re interested in, or even spending ten minutes identifying what you don’t want in your next role. Small, consistent steps will build momentum without the exhaustion of trying to overhaul everything at once.

Prioritize Energy Renewal
Often, the hardest part of a job search is finding the energy to start. Reflect on what activities or routines help you recharge and work them into your day. This doesn’t need to be anything complicated; even taking short breaks, stepping outside, or setting aside “no work” evenings can begin to chip away at burnout and build energy reserves.

Set Your Compass With Clarity
Clarity can be your best motivator. Take a few minutes to think about what must be true in your next role. Is it: better pay, a role aligned with your values, or a less draining environment? Write down these must-haves and keep them visible. Seeing the tangible benefits of change can help kick-start your motivation and remind you why you started.

Lean on Your Network
Reaching out doesn’t have to feel like a chore. Sometimes, all it takes is a quick LinkedIn message to a former coworker or grabbing coffee with a friend who’s recently made a job change. It’s about gently surrounding yourself with support, ideas, and encouragement—others who can help you stay accountable and energized.

Reframe Your Self-Talk
Languishing often leads us to blame ourselves, labeling it “laziness” or “lack of drive”. But give yourself some grace. Remind yourself that burnout is a genuine, emotional barrier to progress, and you’re not failing by taking things slowly. Recognize your progress, however small, and know that you’re moving forward at a pace that respects where you’re currently.

If you want that first small step, start with just one task this week. It could be as simple as identifying what you want from your next job or adding a new bullet point to your resume. Keep it small and manageable—and celebrate every bit of progress, no matter how incremental. You’re not “lazy”; you’re navigating a path through exhaustion, and that in itself is a win.

Rooting for you,
Kelly

Vote for Me: 2024 Career Coach of the Year!

I’m thrilled to share that I’ve been nominated for the Coach Awards 2024 Career Coach of the Year!

If you’ve found value in my guidance, insights, or support along the way, I’d be honored to have your vote. The winner will be announced in a virtual award ceremony on December 18.

Click here to vote—your support means a lot to me!

Normalize, Don’t Idolize—Rethinking How We View Success

When we see people who’ve achieved the success we admire—those with impressive titles, thriving businesses, or standout careers—it’s tempting to put them on a pedestal. Let me share a secret about success: those impressive people with enviable careers? They’re just as human, flawed, and imperfect as the rest of us. Idolizing them can create an illusion that to be “successful”, we must be flawless, perfectly credentialed, and endlessly qualified. I challenge you to throw out that idea and embrace a more realistic view of success. Normalize—don’t idolize—successful people, and redefine what success really means.

1. Success Doesn’t Require Perfection
The myth that success is reserved for those who “have it all together” is just that—a myth. Successful people make mistakes, face rejection, and have moments of insecurity, just like anyone else. Their careers aren’t built on flawless performance; they’re built on persistence, resilience, and learning from missteps. And they’re not necessarily smarter or more talented than you, they’ve simply learned ways to promote, advance, and sell their experiences and ideas.

2. The Power of Authenticity Over Image
When we idolize someone’s success, we often only see the polished image they present to the world. But as you engage with people whose success you admire, you realize they have doubts, weaknesses, and quirks too. They get nervous before big presentations, question their choices, and have off days. Being authentic—letting yourself show up as you are—can be just as powerful as any polished image. Throw out the idea that you need to be a “perfect” professional; being real is what truly connects you to others.

3. Understand That Success Is Built on Flaws as Much as Strengths
Many people find success not by hiding their flaws, but by learning how to work with them. Someone who struggles with having organization may be incredibly creative or visionary, bringing big ideas to life. Another person’s success might come from their empathy, despite feeling like they’re “too sensitive” in the corporate world. Normalize your quirks and challenges—embrace the strengths that come with them, and recognize they’re part of what makes you valuable.

4. Find Confidence in Your Path, Flaws and All
Idolizing others can create a false sense of distance—like they have something you don’t, or that their success comes from some elusive, perfect quality. But they didn’t achieve their success because they were flawless; they just kept going. Rather than feeling held back by your flaws, see them as part of what makes your journey uniquely yours. You don’t need to “fix” yourself to be successful; showing up as you are is enough.

5. Let Admiration Motivate You, Not Intimidate You
Admire people not for an idealized, flawless image but for their persistence, their ability to learn, and their courage to move forward despite imperfections. Seeing successful people as humans just like you helps turn admiration into motivation, not intimidation. Success isn’t reserved for those who appear perfect; it’s available to anyone willing to take steps forward, flaws and all.

By normalizing rather than idolizing those we admire, we free ourselves from the unrealistic expectation that success means perfection. The more we understand that successful people are just as imperfect as we are, the more we open possibilities for ourselves. Success is a journey filled with mistakes, missteps, and doubts—embracing those makes it a path we can all walk, as our real, perfectly imperfect selves. So, let go of the pedestal. Success isn’t about being flawless—it’s about moving forward with resilience and authenticity. And you’re already on that path.

Results > Responsibilities—Prove Your Performance on Your Resume.

When it comes to your resume, listing your responsibilities only scratches the surface of what you bring to a role. Responsibilities are the basic expectations of a job, but they don’t set you apart. It’s the results you achieved, the tangible outcomes and impact of your work—that show hiring managers exactly why you’re a standout candidate. Here’s why results matter more than responsibilities and how focusing on performance can elevate your resume.

1. Responsibilities Are Expected—Results Show Excellence
A responsibility tells the reader what you are supposed to do. A result demonstrates what you accomplished. Instead of saying, “Managed social media channels,” show the value you added: “Increased social media engagement by 40%, leading to a 25% growth in audience.” This shift from duties to outcomes helps the reader measurably understand your impact and expertise.

2. Results Help You Stand Out
Many candidates will have similar responsibilities listed on their resumes, but what sets you apart is what you achieved in that role: “Generated $500K in new business in Q1, surpassing targets by 20%.” This is the difference between blending in with the crowd and making your contributions memorable.

3. Results Reflect Problem-Solving Abilities
Including results allows you to indirectly showcase your problem-solving skills. Responsibilities don’t tell the story of the challenges you faced or how you overcame them, but results do. Instead of saying, “Maintained client relationships,” try something like, “Retained 95% of clients annually by proactively identifying and addressing potential pain points.”

4. Results Are Essential for Performance-Oriented Roles
Many companies are moving toward performance-driven cultures, where it’s not about how many tasks you handle but the outcomes you deliver. By showcasing results, you’re aligning yourself with the modern workplace’s emphasis on performance and outcomes.

5. Results Offer a Quantifiable Value Proposition
Think of your results as a way to quantify your unique value. Numbers make your achievements feel real and tangible, allowing hiring managers to see the specific impact you could bring to their team.

Dollyism.

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